Is Balance a Myth?
Yesterday, I discussed the fact that lately, I’m in demand 24/7. Even when I get time to myself, it’s in 10-minute increments—not exactly the necessary time needed to recharge my batteries. As if to illustrate my point, yesterday I put my son down for his nap and made it downstairs to start working, just to have my daughter finish her nap and be ready to go for the rest of the day. Not surprisingly, as FBG Jenn and I share brains, she talked about balance yesterday over on FBG. Is it really possible, or is it something we all strive to achieve that doesn’t really exist, like that “perfect” weight?
It was a post I needed to read, and not just because she complimented my skills in the balancing act that is my life (thanks, Jenn!). I think she’s totally right in that finding the perfect balance is like chasing perfection that doesn’t exist. And with kids and dogs and life, total perfection of anything just isn’t possible (just check for cracker crumbs in my couch cushions and the pug hair that gathers in corners). Especially considering that I sometimes was a walking disaster pre-kids! How do I expect to have plenty of time to “do it all” when so much of my time and attention is now diverted from things that I didn’t have time for to begin with?
That’s not to say I’m going to put all of my personal desires aside just because I have small kids. I just need to figure out how to do a couple of the selfish things I’m not doing without thinking I’m being selfish. Because while balance may be a difficult perfection to achieve, when you’re out of whack and stretched thin and totally out of balance, you know. In case you’re also seeking balance, read on for Jenn’s original post and tell us, how do you balance it all? —Erin
Is There Really Such as Thing as Balance?
People talk about balance all the time. Heck, I talk about it all the time—finding it, cultivating it, holding on to it for dear life. But is this mythical “balance” all that it’s cracked up to be? And is it even possible to have? It’s something I’ve been thinking a lot about lately…
For our recent FBG retreat we crashed Erin’s house in New Jersey, and I watched as she balanced (there’s that word again) the demands of motherhood, being a wife, being a friend and work. Seeing it first-hand, I think she does it all incredibly well—even though (and I don’t think she’d mind me sharing this with you) she says she feels like she can never do it all quite right or as well as she’d like to.
She, like many, wish for balance. I talk to my other friends about time and friends and workouts and career and even household chores, and they all want that elusive “balance.” That place where the email inbox is empty, the to-do list is checked off, the microwave is clean, they have more than enough time to meditate daily, and they feel good and strong and centered. I myself fall into this trap often. If I could just [insert life event or big to-do/change here], then I’d really feel good and balanced. If I could just finish this project, launch that site, follow this schedule or get that deal, then all would be balanced. The worst is when I rope my husband into the mix—if he could work less, get that big bonus and clean the toilets weekly, then really we’d both be better balanced and do nothing but sip on fine wine, eat like healthy foodies and laugh like we were on vacay 24/7. Right?