Can’t see the video? Click here to get a load of some potty training humor!

It’s funny because I’m sure it’s happened. Any lessons to share from your adventures in potty training? —Erin 

Attachment parenting isn't as controversial as the Time cover would have it seem. Credit: BobbiJanay @When did I go from a kid to a grown up

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you have seen, heard about and have an opinion on the breastfeeding cover of Time magazine. My initial reaction when I saw the cover was that they were certainly looking to stir the pot. And stir they did.

The headline, “Are you Mom enough? Why attachment parenting drives some moms to extremes—and how Dr. Bill Sears became their guru” is a whole lot more controversial than the actual article about attachment parenting. What I found most interesting about the article was that it said mothers seem divided into several camps: 1) Those who fully commit to the attachment parenting model (which consists of breastfeeding, co-sleeping and babywearing), 2) Those who think it’s way too demanding or, say, have to return to work and can’t fully subscribe to AP, and 3) a third camp who are caught in the middle and find themselves “immobilized by their seeming parental inadequacy,” when they can’t do it all.

This, I get. In my days of pregnancy and early days of motherhood, I looked into the attachment parenting philosophy to figure out what it was all about. And to me, a lot of the tenets of attachment parenting make sense. In fact, the Dr. Sears site says that many parents use the approach instinctively. But to follow attachment parenting to a T is not just a little demanding of the mother, but HIGHLY demanding. And it can make those who don’t subscribe fully feel like we’re not measuring up. Not “mom enough.” Even though Dr. Sears’ site on attachment parenting says that it’s an approach, not hard fast rules, it’s still easy to feel like you’re not the best parent when you don’t implement it fully.

The thing about attachment parenting is that it’s not an all or nothing approach. The basic tenets of breastfeeding, co-sleeping and babywearing? They don’t make anyone a better or worse parent. Some women breastfeed, but want the baby to sleep in another room. Some formula feed but have a baby-carrying device for its convenience. There is a wide spectrum of “attachment parents” out there.

I breastfeed because I’ve had good luck with it, it’s easy for me (most of the time), it’s nutritious and it’s relatively free. I co-sleep because my kids have gone through spells in their early days where they wouldn’t sleep if it wasn’t next to me. So in order to be a better, more well-rested parent, I sleep next to my babies when it’s necessary for getting some shut-eye. (The snuggling is nice, too.) Babywearing? Sure, it’s great for snuggling and bonding, but seriously, sometimes the baby just wants to be held, I need my hands, and it’s the practical thing to do because it’s far easier to wear babies than it is to run back to the baby and soothe him every other minute while I’m trying to make dinner.

I’m not doing what I do as a parent to earn the title of “attachment parent.” I don’t win a prize because my baby only sleeps for long stretches when he’s next to me or because I absolutely can’t handle it when my babies cry and I go try to figure out what’s wrong (don’t most parents do that anyway?). I don’t win a parenting award because I wear my son on me because I’ve been too lazy and indecisive to buy a double stroller. (Any recommendations?)

I’m doing what I do as a parent because it comes naturally to me. I’m not failing because I use a stroller and I can’t physically wear two kids on my body. I’m not failing my kids because I own a crib where my daughter (usually) sleeps through the night and that serves as a safe place to put here when I so desperately need five minutes to shower. And I’m not a failure because the bassinet will retire when my son hits three months, and I will start trying to get him to sleep in his own crib down the hall. I’m not a failure because I have a swing and a bouncer, which serve as safe places to put my kids so that I can have a precious minute or two (sometimes it’s literally one single minute) to run and do some necessary chore.

When it comes to parenting, we need to put aside the competition. We’re all doing what we do because it works for us. Moms aren’t likely being “driven to extremes” to follow a particular philosophy. Moms are nursing 3-year-olds because it’s working for them, for whatever reason. Like the cover mom says, it might not be for everyone. And the beauty of it is, it doesn’t have to be. Because all parents are just trying to do what’s working for them and do the best we can for our kids. Period.

Do you think we should end the “mom competition,” too? —Erin

Arnold Pocket Thins will spice up your lunch!

I have two staples for lunch: Leftovers from the night before if I have them and sandwiches. With two kids, I need meals that are super fast, easy and can be put together with minimal brain power as I’m usually running on a few sleep-deprived cylinders.

Sandwiches are a super easy lunch and also a cinch to make healthy and filling, with whole grain breads, lean meats and all kinds of veggies. However. Sandwiches can get boring, right? Well, I recently got to spice up my sandwich endeavors with Arnold/Brownberry/Oroweat Pocket Thins flatbreads, from the makers of Sandwich Thins.

Arnold whole-grain bread is a staple in my house, so the brand isn’t a huge departure from my norm or anything. Available in 8-Grain or Italian Herb, the pre-sliced pita pockets make sandwiches super portable, which is always helpful to the busy mom. I also baked the Italian Herb pita with a little cheese on top to make a cheesy bread, and it was quite tasty!

They clock in at 100 calories per 1/2 pocket, with 5 grams of fiber. So if you’re bored of your PB&J bread-heavy mid-day meal, give these a shot!

What is your favorite go-to lunch? —Erin

You have to buckle in the precious cargo! Credit: jmayer1129

I recently found myself in a parental dilemma, on the giving end of parental advice to another parent. I know, I know. Getting unsolicited advice sucks, like the time my baby-wearing escapades led to me going on the defensive. No one wants to be told the’yre doing it wrong. But I was in a situation where I felt like I had to step in.

I was minding my Facebook business when I came across a picture a friend posted of his daughter in her carseat. She was apparently with a close friend of the family. What struck me about the photo was that the carseat wasn’t properly fastened; it was only loosely placed around the infant.

I thought extensively about this dilemma before drafting a message to my friend. For all I knew, the infant restraint was being loosened to take the baby out of the car. But there was also the chance that the family friend thought the baby was being properly restrained and that the parents didn’t realize it. And there was the possibility that no one knew the baby was being improperly fastened. I weighed the consequences—my conscience should something happen and I hadn’t said anything or an old friend being ticked at me for overstepping. I decided it was worth the risk to the friendship, so I drafted a friendly email stating that he could feel free to tell me to mind my own damn business, but as a crazy pregnant hormonal worrier, I had to mention it. I told him that I had no idea what the situation was but relayed my concerns.

I didn’t hear back.

While I’d really been hoping for a response—any response, really—the lack of a return message doesn’t bother me. Maybe my friend is genuinely offended; maybe he just never had time to respond. But when I ask myself if I’d do it again? Absolutely. Some things are worth speaking up about, no matter the consequences.

Would you have said something in the same situation? —Erin 

What secrets of childbirth would you tell your friend? Credit: coolio-claire

My friend Erika is currently expecting her first child, due in August. (You can read about her pregnancy brain, or lack thereof, here.) And as I found myself going through labor, delivery and childbirth the second time, I kept making mental notes of little things I should tell her about the experience. Little things that would help an expecting mom out. As a first timer, there is so much unknown. How much will it hurt? What is recovery like? What can I expect at the hospital? And although I’ve already shared some dirty secrets of childbirth, here are even more to help expecting moms know what to expect!

Even More Dirty Secrets of Childbirth

1. Potty help. At the hospital, the nurses tell you to get help the first time you have to pee. USE THEM. They will pad you up (cold packs/pads) and show you what to do. And help you clean up—it’s a bit of a blood bath that first time and you need the assistance!

2. Don’t wear your Sunday best. Don’t wear anything you want to keep for the first 24 hours. They’ll give you disposable underwear; just wear the hospital gowns or cheap PJ bottoms in case you bleed through.

3. Listen to the nurses. They’ll tell you to pee often. Pee often! I guess it helps your uterus go back to its rightful place, but you’ll also avoid peeing yourself.

4. Butt, really? Nurses come to see where your uterus is by feeling your stomach and also check your rear. It’s slightly embarrassing.

5. Bring… Lip balm. Bottle for water. SNACKS. My hospital food was amazing (or I was so hungry I thought it was), but it doesn’t always come the moment you need it. Or overnight!

6. LIMIT VISITORS! I don’t know how people with friends and family close get any rest. Between the baby, nurses checking on you, getting your vitals taken constantly, doing blood work, having your trash emptied, talking to lactation consultants and nutritionists (at least at my hospital), and having those people drop off forms and info all the time, I got no rest even without visitors. And you’re bleeding and exhausted and emotional. There is plenty of time for visits out of the hospital.

Credit: nathanmac87

Chill out this Mother’s Day weekend with these links. And don’t forget to enter our giveaways for Pampering Week!

Need new workout ideas? Try a sandbag! —Workout Mommy

We’re watching, too. And rooting for both of you! —Average Moms Wear Capes

Cute shoes for pregnant feet in the summer. —Babble

Doctors stay mum on weight when it comes to kids, too. —Time

Best family cars. Well, at least it kinda justifies our mini-van purchase. —Parenting

Love Rachel Dratch. —lilsugar

And don’t miss out on entering our Pampering Week giveaways!

Innovative Skincare line

Artistry products

Pure Barre Workout DVDs and products

Sara Dean SuperMom workout DVDs

Goodies from the FBM closet

Good luck, and Happy Mother’s Day! —Erin

We’re cleaning out the FBM closet in today’s giveaway! This giveaway comes courtesy of duplicates and bonus goodies that companies send our way when reviewing products—a total win for you ladies! Trust me, there is seriously good stuff in this prize package. What’s included? Oh, just:

• A Belly Beautiful postpartum workout DVD
• Two Mama Wants Her Body Back DVDs
• 3, 2, 1 Get Your Body Back DVD
• Artistry lotion and toner
• Artistry light-up lip gloss
• Jonathan Silky Dirt and Weightless Smooth No-Frizz Hydrating Balm hair products
• A makeup bag
• A Luna hat and water bottle
• Do or Die fitness wedges
• Kushyfoot Flats to Go (size 7-8)
• A Fit Bottomed Girl long-sleeved tee (size small)
• Black and white scarf

Seriously, it’s a super-fun pack. And if the sizes don’t work for you, you can always re-gift and spread the FBG love!

To enter, tell us in the comments which item gets you SUPER pumped. Winner will be chosen in about a week. U.S. residents only, please! —Erin

Credit: Seabamirum

We’re all about spoiling moms this week with our Pampering Week theme—because every mama needs a little TLC!

I hope every mom gets a wonderful breakfast in bed this weekend, complete with a little bit of time to eat it. Breakfast favorites like French toast, pancakes and bacon may not be the healthiest items, but because oatmeal doesn’t always cut it for special occasions, we’ve got some ideas for you! Today, healthy comfort food chef, weight-loss expert and New York Times bestselling author Devin Alexander shares a few simple swaps for a healthier breakfast. Share them with whoever will be bringing you breakfast in bed!

Simple Swaps for a Healthier Breakfast

• Use an olive oil mister, not only to mist pans, but also to spray on top of foods that would otherwise be fried after they emerge from the oven.
• Swap more refined sugars for coconut sugar (aka palm sugar). It won’t spike blood sugar, so you won’t have cravings in the same way. (Note: Because it come from the palm leaves of the coconut tree, not the fruit, it tastes similar to brown sugar and not at all like coconut).
• I find that Greek yogurtmakes an excellent substitute for sour cream when making dips or topping flavor-packed dishes!
• Center-cut bacon, which is actual pork bacon that’s 30 to 40 percent leaner, is a great substitute, especially for those who just don’t care for turkey bacon.
• Use whole-wheat pizza dough for the base of danishes and buttery pastries. It also works for soft pretzels.
• Panko or whole-wheat panko bread crumbs make for an excellent crispy breading that isn’t fried.
• Where possible, opt for egg whites instead of whole eggs.

Will you be enjoying breakfast in bed on Mother’s Day? What dish will you request? —Erin

Sara Dean is one of our go-to fitness pros around here. She’s the founder of Fit Healthy Moms, which she launched to provide moms with the necessary information about postpartum weight-loss. Moms all over the world are currently using her downloadable postpartum weight-loss program, 6 Week Pregnancy Weight Loss and SuperMom Workouts.

Today, we’re giving away not one but TWO prize packs of Sara’s SuperMom Workout DVD sets—10 full-length workouts on 10 DVDs.  The program includes quick, 20-minute workouts to help you shed fat, build lean muscle mass and fit into clothes you haven’t worn in years. If you need some new fitness inspiration, this is it!

To enter, simply comment below with why you’d like to win a set. Winners will be chosen in about a week; U.S. residents only, please. —Erin

Self massage can feel blissful with a tool like this!

We’re all about spoiling moms this week with our Pampering Week theme—because every mama needs a little TLC!

So I was doing some shopping awhile back when I saw what I thought was a whisk in the bath products section of a store. It struck me as odd, so I took a closer look. It wasn’t a whisk at all, but a head massager that looked a bit like a whisk. Skeptical, I pointed it out to my hubby, laughed and carried on with my day.

Then a couple of days later, I went over to Jenn’s for breakfast and saw that she had the crazy head-whisk self-massage device. She insisted I try it, and I didn’t want to put the thing down. I got chills up and down my spine, and I was in head-massage tingly scalp heaven. I immediately attacked my husband when he returned to the room and insisted he try it STAT. He had a similar blissed-out reaction. Ahhh.

I’m not even kidding when I say that within a couple of days we had picked up a few of them—one for us, one for his sister and one for his parents. The thing is amazing. You know how good it feels when someone else gives you a shampoo? It’s like that—with dozens of tiny fingers massaging your scalp. As a cheap relaxation device, you can’t beat it! Mine was only $3.99, but you can get great deals out there, like this three-pack for less than $8.

Now, the wonderful sensation is at its maximum effectiveness the first minute of use. Your scalp gets used to it and then it only feels just good. But whip it out once a day for a minute or so when you’re stressed, and you will be one happy camper!

Have you tried this crazy doo-dad? Love it as much as I do? —Erin